I have in the past written on the importance of each of us to find our own strength, to find each our own ground and to roll with it until it works for us. Somehow I have found a place in my spirit where I can be still and courageous to follow my dreams, they have been difficult to follow, but somehow I have found the strength to follow nonetheless.
What I am yet to learn is how to silence the other spirits and energies that surround me. In my growing up, I was keen to surround myself with positive energy, people who believe in me and trusted that I am strong enough to make anything work for me. My slogan was greatness, I walked talked and behaved like greatness, because I believed that was my destiny.
But as life went by and the struggles begun, I somehow lost myself, greatness became farfetched and I started looking to survive a day at a time. To find today’s end meat, today’s shelter, today’s stability. I became shallow in my thoughts and convinced myself that tomorrow was not guaranteed, that only today matters.
In the same process, I opened my mind and my heart to everyone who came my way. Anyone who could make my today had an access to my spirit. It is in that struggle that I lost my energy of greatness. I was influenced by any thought that anyone had of me. If they said I was foolish, if they said I was poor, if they said I couldn’t amount to anything, I believed them, I gave them space to invade in my greatness, to push that spirit to a far off corner where it was difficult to see or reach.
These are things that are so easy to do. I will explain by example; when we were young, we all had dreams, we all knew what we wanted to be growing up. Some of us were lucky to have guardians who exposed us to all possibilities, and even for those of us who didn’t, somehow the world conspired in the innocence of our childhood to make us believe that whatever we put our mind to we can achieve.
Some of us even dreamt of it.
Those of us who exposed ourselves to this same thought even after independence from our guardians have somehow landed ourselves close if not where we hoped to be. Those of us who lost hope or deviated from our thoughts, are still struggling to find our way. Some of us have completely lost direction, become bitter and hopeless, we have bore negative energy, and then we have carried that energy and used it to fight those with the positive energy.
Persons who are violent towards their spouses, they sack out their partner’s positive energy by consistently abusing them either verbally or physically, showing them that they are nothing and and deserve little to no respect. People who allow this to happen to them have basically given out their power of control over their lives and have accepted to die in the inside. They have accepted to let go of their positive space.
It is not just violence that sack out people’s energy, it is what we say, what we do and how we do it.
We consistently throw abuse at each other, discourage each other and try to convince each other that in no wildest imagination can we get to where we are purposing to go.
The brave people who want to retain their positive energy run away from these mentality, they go their way to find likeminded people, people who like their guardians, will expose them to all possibilities and encourage them to get to where they are purposed to be.
For me, my purpose is greatness by my own count.
I am one of the lucky few who have found my way back to my energy. I am one of the lucky few who now understand that I am the only one who can determine which direction my life choses to take. I have fought my own negativity until when I have found the positive space, and now I am willing to guide that space with all that I have got.
I write this with the risk of sounding shallow or unrelatable, but I surely hope that it’s making sense and that it will drive you to a place of analysis.
Are you among the half that are discouraged with life and who will go around passing negative energy to others? Or are you in the other half that is willing to struggle through and find our spot?
Let me know your side of the coin